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'Yes, he is.'
'That must make you very proud.' 'It does.'
'And you, sugar, how are you feeling?'
'Oh, I'm fine. I keep having tiny contractions, but I've had them all along.'
'I don't like the sound of that. You take care of yourself, hear?V
'Oh, I do, and Mac is taking good care of me.'
'And so he should.' She looked around the room. 'My, this is attractive. I
like
the way you've moved things around. Those chairs by the fireplace are
shabbier
than they should be. I'll speak to the ladies.'
'Oh, they're fine.'
'You just leave it to me, sugar. Now watch those contractions, hear?V
'I will,' Camilla promised.
But on Christmas afternoon the contractions became labor. 'At least all the
services are over,' Camilla gasped.
Mac barely got her to the hospital before she lost the baby.
Olivia came to bring Camilla home from the hospital. The fetus had been
developing normally, the obstetrician said;
Madeleine L'Engle,132
there was no apparent reason for her to have miscarried. 'But it sometimes
happens. Give yourself a couple of months' respite and try again.'
'Your body is going to rebel against this interruption,' Olivia said. 'You
need
petting and pampering. I know you're bitterly disappointed, we all are. But
there'll be more babies for you and Mac.'
A cable came from Paris in TERRIBLY SHOCKED AND SORRY HER
And then a phone call from Rose, full of murmurs of sympathy combined with
exultation about her own pregnancy which left Camilla in tears. Tears of
anger
as well as grief.
Olivia said, 'Of course you're angry. Your mother is doing what you are
supposed
to do. The chronology is upside down. It's outrageous. Don't feel badly about
your reaction. We all share it.'
Yes, it was upside down, as our eyes see upside down, as the camera sees
upside
down, and no way to right it. Camilla was ashamed at the intensity of her
reaction, but there it was. Luisa helped by calling, angry about the loss of
the
baby, and outraged at Rose's pregnancy. 'It's absurd,' Luisa sputtered. 'Oh,
Cam, if you're as angry as I am, you're raging.'
'Yes,' Camilla agreed. 'That expresses it.'
'Let it out,' Luisa advised. 'And if you can't, I'll do it for you. I'm
infuriated for you. I hope you'll have twins next time. Triplets.'
'One at a time will be fine,' Camilla said.
E.
response to Camilla's letter: TRIED TO PHONE ALI. WELL
On Sunday evening the youth group came, bringing a kitten, carried tenderly
by
Pinky Morrison. Freddy Lee brought cat food, and Gordie Byrd carried a bag of
kitty litter.
A kitten to replace a baby, Camilla thought bitterly, but managed to smile,
to
thank them. The kitten was put in her
A Live Coal in the Sea,133
lap, but immediately leapt off, dashed across the room, ascended into the air
and onto the sideboard, then leapt onto the newel post, wobbled there,
getting
its balance, and catapulted itself back into Camilla's lap. She could not
help
laughing with the rest of them.
'Quantum!' she exclaimed. 'That's what we'll call it. It's surely making
quantum
leaps.'
'What's a quantum leap?' Wiz Morrison asked.
Mac said, quickly, 'It's time for Camilla-and Quantum-to go up to bed. The
doctor said she shouldn't be up for more than a few hours.'
The young people stood, in immediate apology.
'No, no,' Camilla protested, 'you were wonderful to come. You've made me feel
much better. I'll take the kitten with me and hope he won't leap all the way
back down the stairs.'
When Mac came up she was in bed, with the kitten curled up on her shoulder,
purring in its sleep. Camilla said, 'I'm glad you stopped me from having to
explain a quantum leap. I'm sure Mrs. Lee would see it as something totally
unscriptural.'
'Um,' Mac said. 'That's the main reason I barged in. Freddy Lee's a nice guy,
but Gordie Byrd would have found something nasty to say. It was also time for
you to get off to bed. I've fixed a litter pan in a corner of the kitchen,
and
some food and water, so let me take the little creature down and get him used
to
his new dwelling.'
A week later Camilla received a call from Noelle, who determinedly kept in
touch, as though Camilla continued to be some kind of lifeline for her. 'Oh,
Cam, I'm visiting Andrew in Atlanta. He's doing a residency at Grady, and
that's
a really tough hospital, but it turns out super doctors. One of his best pals
comes from Athens, he's a favorite nephew of somebody he calls Aunt Edith at
the
university, so I heard you lost a baby. That's lousy. I'm really sorry.' [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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